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Writer's pictureemmmascrafton

Forget happy, I want to be free

'Freedom is nothing else but a chance to be better'



Somewhere inside our brains we are hardwired to believe that happiness is some kind of beautiful destination. It's as though happiness is right around the corner, and our whole lives are dedicated to finally arriving there. It comes right after our next promotion, that new car we’ve been saving for, or that expensive engagement ring on our finger. We fool ourselves into thinking that all of our efforts will add up to eternal bliss, so long as we keeping taking steps higher up the never ending ladder.


There is so much weight placed on being happy; if you’re not happy, you’re too picky. If you’re overly happy, you’re delusional. Being sad or hitting a low makes us feel like we are a burden on the people around us; worrying that people will see sadness as a sign of weakness and/or that we won’t be successful until a pearly white grin is permanently plastered on our overwhelmed faces. We chase it but we can’t win, and in the end, this quest for happiness leaves us feeling anything but happy.


The slight glimmer of truth we can gather from this reality is that there is no 'destination happiness' but rather a facade; yet we spend our whole lives looking forward to it, straight into our graves. So let's try giving up this act and stop looking for the things that don’t exist; what if, instead, we focused on being free.


I don’t want fake happiness but rather, I want real freedom; the type of freedom that lets me be whoever I want to be with not strings attached. I want to be free from soul crushing expectations and every stigmatism that has ever been placed on my name. I want freedom to love the people I do and chase the things that actually make me excited to be alive. Why should I chase after the unattainable when I can give myself the freedom to create more pieces of happiness on my own.


There is so much power in taking life into your own hands and deciding who you are and what you want. Being happy is not linear, and part of actual happiness is accepting the lows along with the highs. You have to realise that our bad days lead us to the good ones, and that you can’t get too comfortable with wherever you currently are. However, the one thing you can make sure of, is the ability to choose your life and the ability to create the life you want and know with certainty that no one else chose it for you. Not allowing anyone from shoving you into a box and turning you into what they think you need to be; you made it here, and you choose where you go next.


I say this having learnt it myself; stop chasing a mirage and start taking control of the things you can actually take control of. Take the hard times and let them make you thankful for the good ones. Move your life in the direction you know you want to go, as after all, when you finally give yourself permission to be free, begin embracing the journey as you are bound to find more happiness along the way.


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